Destined to be Alone...?

Time: 10.26am
Location: Office

When I'm back to blogging, it usually means my deadlines are over, and I'm so free that I'm surfing auctions...and when I've done that and read all the interesting threads in forum, I'm back to blogging...(I'm starting to rhyme..at least for the first 2 sentences)

(Now: 11.08am)
I went back to work and completely all the amendments for the school diary I'm doing. Yeah...now I'm quite certain women are excellent at multi-tasking.

Anyway, I meant to post some pics of my recent buys..but haven't had time to get around to do it. Besides, I'll freak close friends out when they realise how much I've spent.

Recently, I discovered something about myself. Well, it came about when I was reading the NEWPaper and they had this really wacky column by Kumar. He's kinda like Aunt Agony, but more blunt and funny. A lady wrote in to ask him what should she do with a guy who calls her 'babe'. She finds it degrading and wants to avoid him. His reply was that she should get over it and stop being shallow. (Or something like that) Which made me think, I'm very much like this lady too.

Friends who know me well will know that I have this 'blacklist'. There's like certain things I can't stand in people and I'll avoid them at all cost. Maybe it's a Scorpio trait, 'cos I remember reading that Scorpios have few friends 'cos they tend to "freeze the unworthy ones". - That's courtesy of Linda Goodman, a famous astrologer.

I'm not really sociable in the first place, so I don't make new friends easily. Or rather, it depends on my mood, and if I like that person well enough to want to make friends with them. Girls are fine in general, 'cos we'll just chit if we have the same frequency. Guys, it's a different story. 'Cos if you have the right frequency, you tend to wonder if he's "THE ONE" you've been waiting for. Perhaps my biological clock is ticking, so it's kinda like the "I WANT TO FIND A MATE-URGENT" phrase.

There were a few guys who tried to be nice to me and chat with me like friends, but somehow, I tend to cut the conversation short. I simply do not know what to say to them without seeming patronising. In fact, a very nice guy whom I befriended started out as someone whom I thought I can be friends with..until he starts to message one too many times, and each time, wanted to call and chat. Don't get it right, he's not interested in me. In fact, he'll call me to tell me about this gal whom he really likes and he's unsure of what to do next.

Which irritates me. I mean, firstly, I don't even know you that well. And I'm not much of a listener. (Wait....I'm not much of a conversationalist either...ok not with people I don't know well) so it kinda irks me when someone wants to droon on and on about another person whom I don't even know.

Ok, I know some people will think I'm shallow as hell and totally self-centred. I think I am too. Maybe 'cos my work's schedule so tight that I really can't be bothered to entertain people whom I don't really fancy.

Everybody's gonna hate me soon....if they don't already and I'm not just speaking satirically. What if I'm 50 and still like this!!?!

Gosh.. somebody help me.